Killing Them Softly: On Keeping the “Fem” in Femme Fatale

Red Lips Always Lie

You know, dear reader, I’ve begun to truly loathe the recent trend of writing female characters as “strong independent women.”

That isn’t to say I don’t like strong female characters, mind you!

Hell no. In fact having strong female characters in a story is usually a good sign and denotes a narrative of quality.

A pity, then, that most writers consider a “strong and independent woman” to be nothing more than a toxic male douchebag with a vagina and/or brazier.

They’re brash, selfish, condescending, unnecessarily prone to violence, and generally just unlikeable prigs. Why then do so many writers portray their female characters as a store brand knock off of an already tired and universally panned masculine trope?

Because they’re trying to portray strength and falling flat on their face that’s why.

You see, they don’t want to be sexist by portraying a woman as traditionally feminine and so make her “one of the boys” instead.

Now tell me, dear reader, and tell me true: does this not inherently associate femininity with weakness? Is this very act of attempting to make said female character stronger not itself sexist as absolute FUCK?

All of a sudden a female character must forego any skirt or dress in favor of pants and military style boots. She must be ruder in her interactions than her male counterparts, more crass in her dialogue, stronger in her physique, more deadly in her ability to fight. She can’t just knock out one dude three times her size with a single punch but an entire *room* of such men because she’s just THAT. DAMN. GOOD. She is quite literally the stereotypical chest thumping jock with a room temperature IQ who has to assert dominance over the other male characters in the story because she is the ALPHA, ok? She is STRONG.

Sigh.

Now, here’s the thing, dear reader: I would argue the writer’s intent here is (usually) good but it displays a profound misunderstanding of what true strength is.

Should a writer be able to show a woman able to handle their own in a conversation or in a fight? Absolutely. Should women be portrayed as swearing like a sailor? By all means. However I believe the trope of “toxic strong female women” (and yes it has become common place enough in modern entertainment to become a trope at this point) loses itself once it starts associating all the negative traits of male characters as something to aspire to while simultaneously and universally despising everything that one might associate with femininity.

The popular hot take that to write a strong female character one must only write them as a man is, frankly speaking, terrible advice.

Men and women are similar, yes, but we have vast and significant differences. We experience different societal pressures; experience the world through an entirely different physiology.

The fact of the matter is that when presented with an obstacle our kneejerk reactions to it are not going to fall into the same spectrum, and that’s ok. There isn’t anything wrong with that.

But to portray the “best” woman as what is understood to be the worst of men is a quite frankly baffling decision and it is my opinion that we should all avoid this post-modern nonconformist horseshit at all costs.

Strength does not come from denying your femininity or sexuality or emotions. Strength comes from perseverance. Of being terrified but holding on anyway. A female character that wears a dress and knits for a living that refuses to bow to the Gestapo when asked if she is harboring Jewish kids in her basement and a woman that is basically Deadpool with tits are not in the same ballpark when it comes to grit and I’m tired of pretending they are.

Strength of character will out, dear reader. All the rest is just so much pathetic window dressing.

The world needs strong female characters, yes, just as it needs strong male characters but for the love of all that is sacred write them as people: flawed, yet able to acknowledge their flaws and perhaps one day to even overcome them.

Whatever you do, just do everyone a favor and leave this tired old trope behind.

It’s long overstayed its welcome.